The Ultimate Diet

Sitting at the computer for hours at a time, during the last five years, had helped me write seven books and publish four, but it definitely damaged my waistline and loaded pounds of fat on my hips and belly.

I tried to lose the extra weight on my own through Weight Watchers and South Beach Diet. I followed the diets for three to four weeks and give up at the first crisis.

Last year my daughter and husband encouraged me to seek help from a personal trainer and exercise. I did. Faithfully. For four months. Four times a week. One to two hours every day. I lost ten pounds of fat. Only of fat. The fat got converted to muscles. I felt good about myself and my health improved. But my clothes didn’t fit because overall, my weight and measurements remained the same. And my moral didn’t improve much. At the first crisis, I munched a lot, overate again and piled a few more pounds. Fat or muscles, who cared. The pounds stuck to my body determined to stay. I tried to ignore them.

Two days ago, I reached a record high on the scale. My heart sank as the damn arrow kept moving up and stabilized on a number I never reached even when nine-month- pregnant. Tears welled in my eyes. I had to do something. I remembered the phone number a friend gave me three months ago. I called the Quick Weight Loss Center. They told me to come right away.

The meeting was interesting but I was not convinced. Their diet excluded cheese, nuts, yogurt, mango, avocado,… all my favorite food. The manager took me to an office and asked me to sit across from her desk, in a chair positioned in front of a mirror. Every time I glanced up, I saw myself in the mirror and immediately asked more questions about the diet. Before I knew what I was doing I handed my credit card. Later I thought I should hire this manager to be my publicist. She sure knew how to convince a client to buy their services and product. That day I went home and indulged on all the food I love, the way people used to do on Fat Tuesday before starting Lent. But that diet looked much worse than Lent!!!

I started my diet yesterday. Phase one: I have to drink ten glasses of water a day, eat only protein and GREEN vegetables, raw or steamed. No salt or sugar. I was allowed 1/8 of a cantaloupe a day. It’s not a big piece, believe me. By 6 pm at the end of the first day I was dizzy, suffered an incredible headache and stomach cramps. I was hardly able to drive home and collapsed on my bed. I slept straight till the morning. Today was better. It seems that my body is adjusting to the lack of carbohydrates and the incredible volume of water I sip.

By next Wednesday, I will start phase two. They will give me herbs and vitamins to swallow. I can add some fruits and dark bread. I will receive as special treat packets of pudding and cappuccino. I hope they taste good but anyway after starving for a week, any remotely sweet food will be delicious.

They will monitor me for a year. Still I am not too optimistic considering my last year fiasco at the gym.

Am I crazy? To spend so much money to starve myself.

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